black holes and gray matter. in one thousand tangos.

             
“Say Anything is 25 years old, as are all the unfulfilled hopes and aspirations of your youth, including but not limited to the dream you had of making a difference in the lives of people other than your friends and family and the vague ideas that at some point in your life the work you would be doing would have meaning in and of itself and not merely be the thing you dragged yourself into each morning because you became a prisoner to status and possessions and the ever-increasing series of compromises and “temporary” positions you took with the delusion that you would only do those things until you got yourself to a place where you were able to follow your bliss, and now when you look back on that idealistic kid from 1989 you are stricken with a mixture of disgust for the ignorance of youth and sadness about the hard realities of life. But of course this is only true for people of a certain age; if you are much younger, don’t worry, I’m sure everything will work out exactly the way you expect it to.”
Movie Old

Say Anything is 25 years old, as are all the unfulfilled hopes and aspirations of your youth, including but not limited to the dream you had of making a difference in the lives of people other than your friends and family and the vague ideas that at some point in your life the work you would be doing would have meaning in and of itself and not merely be the thing you dragged yourself into each morning because you became a prisoner to status and possessions and the ever-increasing series of compromises and “temporary” positions you took with the delusion that you would only do those things until you got yourself to a place where you were able to follow your bliss, and now when you look back on that idealistic kid from 1989 you are stricken with a mixture of disgust for the ignorance of youth and sadness about the hard realities of life. But of course this is only true for people of a certain age; if you are much younger, don’t worry, I’m sure everything will work out exactly the way you expect it to.

Movie Old

"I’m 87 years old…I only eat so I can smoke and stay alive.. The only fear I have is how long consciousness is gonna hang on after my body goes. I just hope there’s nothing. Like there was before I was born. I’m not really into religion, they’re all macrocosms of the ego. When man began to think he was a separate person with a separate soul, it created a violent situation.
The void, the concept of nothingness, is terrifying to most people on the planet. And I get anxiety attacks myself. I know the fear of that void. You have to learn to die before you die. You give up, surrender to the void, to nothingness.
Anybody else you’ve interviewed bring these things up? Hang on, I gotta take this call….. Hey, brother. That’s great, man. Yeah, I’m being interviewed… We’re talking about nothing. I’ve got him well-steeped in nothing right now. He’s stopped asking questions.”
- Harry Dean Stanton

"I’m 87 years old…I only eat so I can smoke and stay alive.. The only fear I have is how long consciousness is gonna hang on after my body goes. I just hope there’s nothing. Like there was before I was born. I’m not really into religion, they’re all macrocosms of the ego. When man began to think he was a separate person with a separate soul, it created a violent situation.

The void, the concept of nothingness, is terrifying to most people on the planet. And I get anxiety attacks myself. I know the fear of that void. You have to learn to die before you die. You give up, surrender to the void, to nothingness.

Anybody else you’ve interviewed bring these things up? Hang on, I gotta take this call….. Hey, brother. That’s great, man. Yeah, I’m being interviewed… We’re talking about nothing. I’ve got him well-steeped in nothing right now. He’s stopped asking questions.”

- Harry Dean Stanton

(via bbook)

"We in the United States grow up celebrating ourselves as the world’s most powerful nation, the world’s richest nation, the world’s freest and most blessed nation.

Sure, technically Norwegians may be wealthier per capita, and the Japanese may live longer, but the world watches the N.B.A., melts at Katy Perry, uses iPhones to post on Facebook, trembles at our aircraft carriers, and blames the C.I.A. for everything. We’re No. 1!

In some ways we indisputably are, but a major new ranking of livability in 132 countries puts the United States in a sobering 16th place. We underperform because our economic and military strengths don’t translate into well-being for the average citizen.

In the Social Progress Index, the United States excels in access to advanced education but ranks 70th in health, 69th in ecosystem sustainability, 39th in basic education, 34th in access to water and sanitation and 31st in personal safety. Even in access to cellphones and the Internet, the United States ranks a disappointing 23rd, partly because one American in five lacks Internet access.

“It’s astonishing that for a country that has Silicon Valley, lack of access to information is a red flag,” notes Michael Green, executive director of the Social Progress Imperative, which oversees the index. The United States has done better at investing in drones than in children, and cuts in social services could fray the social fabric further.

This Social Progress Index ranks New Zealand No. 1, followed by Switzerland, Iceland and the Netherlands. All are somewhat poorer than America per capita, yet they appear to do a better job of meeting the needs of their people. …

Many who back proposed Republican cuts in Medicaid, food stamps and public services believe that such trims would boost America’s competitiveness. Looking at this report, it seems that the opposite is true.

Ireland, from which so many people fled in the 19th century to find opportunity in the United States, now ranks 15th. That’s a notch ahead of the United States, and Ireland is also ahead of America in the category of “opportunity.” …

Over all, the United States’ economy outperformed France’s between 1975 and 2006. But 99 percent of the French population actually enjoyed more gains in that period than 99 percent of the American population. Exclude the top 1 percent, and the average French citizen did better than the average American. This lack of shared prosperity and opportunity has stunted our social progress.”

We’re Not No. 1! We’re Not No. 1!

In a lot of ways this is a city built on Pretend. We pretend that we aren’t getting older, that we can still be out until four in the morning and it won’t be any different when we wake up than it was in our early 20s. We pretend that we have plenty of time to accomplish all the goals we think are still within our reach. We pretend that the careless ways we act and the carelessness with which we allow ourselves to be treated in turn are merely temporary stops on the way to the true happiness that we think is surely our reward for working so hard at the things we pretend make a difference or mean something. We pretend that everything is practice, everything is temporary, and that on the one day we finally decide we are ready to take ourselves seriously the world will stand up and applaud and say, “Finally! Have anything you want, it’s no less than what you deserve!” If we catch a glimpse of ourselves in the mirror as we pass by we pretend that we don’t see the wrinkles, the hard-set eyes, the dents and dings and damage and decay that the years of hard living have chipped out of us, the sad and addled residue that is the inevitable result of what can only be characterized as a toxic lifestyle. But most of all we pretend that everything we eat here hasn’t been touched by rats at some point. Because as rough as all the other stuff is, you can probably cope with it if you really have to, but there’s no way to get by if you are forced to acknowledge just how much anything you put in your mouth has been all rubbed up on by vermin. Now let’s never talk about it again.”

Don’t Mention the Rats

"Sorry, I can’t go out; I’m going to be tired later."
“Getting Out of Bed
What fresh hell is this? Oh, daytime. Is there a point? Well, can you still feel the crushing weight of existential dread pressing down, forcing the air from your lungs until each breath is more shallow and desperate? Yes?
Congratulations, there is no point. Hit the snooze button just right and you can relive this horrifying realization of your own cosmic irrelevance two or three more times in the next 30 minutes.
Prepping Your Face for the Bathmat
So you made it out of bed before peeing yourself and now you need a rest. But the couch is way too far away and you’re not yet ready to admit that you won’t be bathing today. Again! What to do? Why not just slide down off the toilet and take a rest on that nice, plush bathmat? The one the two of you bought on your last trip to IKEA together, when you had so much fun pointing out all the couples fighting with each other. Remember how you took that bathmat and the new shoe rack he bought you to your favorite neighborhood bar and laughed about it? You were a fun girlfriend. What’s that smell? Probably mildew. This place is a shithole.
The Latest Fashions for Shut-Ins
Is it clean? Wear it. Is it dirty? Have you smelled it? Wear it. Is it on you right now? Keep wearing it. Is it chafing? Cut the waistband.”
"New Advancements in Staring
Possible places to cast your lifeless gaze: the wall, the ceiling, a muted television, the lips of whoever happens to be speaking, the bracelet you admired at an art fair that he bought in secret and saved for your birthday, piles of dirty laundry, a pan of brownies with all the edge pieces cut out, pictures from when you were too young to know what a disappointment you would be, the nest of your own hair piling up in the corner, your side-of-knee fat, the phone, the floor.”
BLAH

"Sorry, I can’t go out; I’m going to be tired later."

Getting Out of Bed

What fresh hell is this? Oh, daytime. Is there a point? Well, can you still feel the crushing weight of existential dread pressing down, forcing the air from your lungs until each breath is more shallow and desperate? Yes?

Congratulations, there is no point. Hit the snooze button just right and you can relive this horrifying realization of your own cosmic irrelevance two or three more times in the next 30 minutes.

Prepping Your Face for the Bathmat

So you made it out of bed before peeing yourself and now you need a rest. But the couch is way too far away and you’re not yet ready to admit that you won’t be bathing today. Again! What to do? Why not just slide down off the toilet and take a rest on that nice, plush bathmat? The one the two of you bought on your last trip to IKEA together, when you had so much fun pointing out all the couples fighting with each other. Remember how you took that bathmat and the new shoe rack he bought you to your favorite neighborhood bar and laughed about it? You were a fun girlfriend. What’s that smell? Probably mildew. This place is a shithole.

The Latest Fashions for Shut-Ins

Is it clean? Wear it. Is it dirty? Have you smelled it? Wear it. Is it on you right now? Keep wearing it. Is it chafing? Cut the waistband.

"New Advancements in Staring

Possible places to cast your lifeless gaze: the wall, the ceiling, a muted television, the lips of whoever happens to be speaking, the bracelet you admired at an art fair that he bought in secret and saved for your birthday, piles of dirty laundry, a pan of brownies with all the edge pieces cut out, pictures from when you were too young to know what a disappointment you would be, the nest of your own hair piling up in the corner, your side-of-knee fat, the phone, the floor.”

BLAH

©2011 Kateoplis